Darling, I am concerned about our marriage. I have been reflecting on our conversations, we are not growing. We have been married for years but not growing.
Our conversations are still surface level, yet we are meant to be naked in marriage. I feel like we both have our walls, there are deeper layers yet to reveal to each other. Trust me my love, open up to me, show me who you really are. You can hide from the world, but please don’t hide from me. I feel like we choose what to tell each other; you can tell me anything. I won’t judge you. I am not going anywhere. I will handle you with care.
Our conversations lack depth and emotional flow; we often just talk about work issues, the children, bills and how our parents are. Can we grow our companionship deeper?
Years later, we are still talking about the same issues, we have made little progress on things we agreed about years ago. This is tiring me and tiring you. Can we stop procrastinating? You work on you, I work on me; we work on us.
We still have the mindset of singles yet we are married. We pull to different directions, holding on to our guard, quick to prove who is right and easily shaken by storms. By now, we should be masters in handling conflict.
Spiritually, we are still drinking milk instead of solid food. Our prayers are Sunday School prayers, the basics, prayers for food and “Thank you Lord for this day”. Can we go to the spiritual upper room? Can we have in depth Bible Study? Can we more than acknowledge God, can we chase after God? Can we go on spiritual warfare for ourselves, our children, our relatives, our lineage and community?
When was the last time we intentionally did something to make us grow together? Let us read books, do couple quizzes, attend events that make us grow, watch movies together, debate… I love it when you differ with me respectfully and offer a fresh perspective into topics.
Can we have more than conversations of “How was your day?” but also have detailed conversations about where we want to be in the future, what values do we want our children to have in adulthood, what investments should we make, how can we advance our business, how can we reign together?
Can we move past highlighting the problems in society or in our marriage and become a solution-oriented couple?
Darling, time is not slowing down, we are not getting any younger. We need to see growth in our union, and it starts with the conversations we have. I want to grow with you. Please grow with me
Christianity 